Christmas in the Park 3: The Layering of Lights

One of my favorite Christmas stories of all time is Move Over, Santa - Ruby's Doin' Christmas! by Ruby Ann Boxcar. Sorry Rudolph, Scrooge, Ralphie, and George Bailey...Ruby and her pals at the trailer park are far more entertaining. Since I haven't had an original thought in months, and since I lovelovelove this book and re-read it every December, I thought I'd just go ahead and plagiarize some excerpts to share with you for the holiday season. Ruby, don't sue me; just consider this free advertising. Seriously, you guys need to run right over (and by "run", I mean "click") to Amazon and buy this book. Funniest. Book. Ever.


This third selection comes from the chapter, Preparin' Yer Trailer Inside and Out for the Holiday Season.

If you find yourself out drivin' in a trailer park community, you'll most likely notice the Christmas lights that are strung up on the trailers. Naturally we never take any of our outside lights down, but simply continue to pile 'em on top of each other. Well, this is how you can tell who has the most money in the park. The more strands of workin' lights means the most money. Don't confuse that with the most strands of lights with some workin' 'cause that is a sign of elderly folks who've been addin' more each year, but didn't have the money or the get-up-and-go to perform any kind of maintenance on them older strands of lights. As for those other trailers that y'all will see that just have a few strings of Christmas lights hangin' on 'em, they most likely are either new to the trailer park, young people in their first trailer, newlyweds, or Jewish.

Stay tuned for tomorrow's tip on decorating your holiday face.